Barker Beauty Interview

I'm not sure if it is publicly known but Bob Barker from the daytime game show The Price is Right was involved in many sexual harassment lawsuits with the women that he worked with. They were ironically called The Barker Beauties. The lawsuits were kept very hush-hush and not much information was known, until now. I have with me today one of Barker's Beauties who is going to sit down and do an exclusive first time interview with me here on 'Just the Cheese'. Please welcome to the stage Ivonna Bangkok.

PTM: I am so glad that you picked this blog to do your first interview on. I am truly honored. How are you feeling today?

Ivonna: Rich. Oh...please edit that out. Where is the buffet I was promised?

PTM: How long did you work on The Price is Right?

Ivonna: What? Oh that, hmmm....I'm not supposed to discuss it, but long enough to get a reputation.

PTM: What were some of the names that Bob called you?

Ivonna: God...as in Oh mostly, which is better then being referred to as a Barker. I'll tell you something that's not well known, everyone thinks we got called that because it's his name but it's actually more about his favorite position. And the fact that he liked us to bark when he was doing it. But please don't ask about the dog collar...although I think there might be pictures on a website somewhere.

PTM: Were you intimately involved with any of the other girls on the show?

Ivonna: Well yes, but then sometimes Bob needed a rest.

PTM: What do you think of these abs? (lifts up shirt and points at abs)

Ivonna: Are you doing anything later?

PTM: Would it be all right if I asked what your favorite sexual position is?

Ivonna: I like them all, but of course there is one that will always remind me of Bob. Would you like me to show you? 

PTM: There was a rumor going around that Bob has a penile implant, can you comment on that?

Ivonna: Yes, the surgeon did a great job - you really wouldn't know it used to be a vagina.

PTM: Did Bob and Rod Roddy, may he rest in peace, ever gang up on you?

Ivonna: Only on public holidays....and once on my birthday.

PTM: Your son looks an awful lot like Bob, could he be the father?

Ivonna: I beg your pardon? I have a daughter.

PTM: You know, I have a jacuzzi in my dressing room. How about you meet me in there after the show? I'll bring the bubble bath.

Ivonna: As long as the price is right, just be sure and bring those abs.

PTM: Don't forget you signed that waiver before the show so you can't sue me for sexual harassment. I'm smarter than Bob. Last question then we are out of time. What is your favorite Price is Right game?

Ivonna: The ones the censors wouldn't let you see. And I'll be the one doing the harassment but don't be thinking you can sue me, it's not like I have any money. I spent it on these (lifts top and points at massive tits). 

How much am I getting paid for doing this? 

PTM: We can discuss that in the jacuzzi. That's all the time we have today. Thanks for watching and tune in next time when we will have Bob Barker to tell his side of the story. (looks at producer) What's that? We couldn't get Bob? The best we could do is Drew Carey?  No, no, I will not stand for this. I will call Bob personally. Drew is a douche. See you next time folks.

I would like to thank Dirtycowgirl for playing the part of Ivonna. It was her first time guest posting on JTC and she did an awesome job. Anyone that goes and gives her some blog love will get a free T-shirt. Click HERE to visit Left Alone With A Full Moon.

Interview With a Legend

With us today is a very well known and respected female figure. Please give a warm welcome to the one and only Miss Piggy.

PTM: Thank you for sitting down with us today. It is nice to finally meet you.

Miss Piggy: I know!

PTM: Are you excited about the new Muppets movie coming out?

Miss Piggy: You mean the one I'LL be starring in? Of course! I'm drunk. You're exciting....

PTM: I heard a rumor that you and Kermit were having some marital problems. Something about an affair with Fozzie. Is any of that true?

Miss Piggy: Next question.

PTM: Have you ever eaten bacon?

Miss Piggy: I have. Problem?

PTM: Who is your celebrity crush and what would you do if you met them?

Miss Piggy: Taylor Lautner. everything I would do to him is probably illegal and not just because I'm an animal (winks)

PTM: You have had a very successful career, what do you think you will be doing 10 years from now?

Miss Piggy: Justin Bieber.

PTM: Ok, my director is telling me that a stage hand found a pile of feces in your dressing room. I knew you were a pig, but come on. You couldn’t use the toilet?

Miss Piggy: That's not mine.....OKAY! OKAY! I'm DRUNK. Shit happens!

PTM: Is it true that a few years ago Gonzo was in rehab for 2 months for a coke problem?

Miss Piggy: Yes. But seeing as this questionnaire is about your truly (bats eyes) we could talk about MY coke pro...I mean......(smiles)

PTM: We only have a few more minutes so I’m going to take a question or two from the audience. You, in the front in the Goonies shirt. What is your question?

Audience Member: Can any of the Muppet Babies understand Beaker?

Miss Piggy: When we're under the influence. 

PTM: Last question, you, the guy that looks like Santa Claus.

Audience Member: Donald Duck doesn’t wear pants but when he comes out of the shower he wraps a towel around his waist. What’s up with that?

Miss Piggy: That might be due to the time he got arrested for coke. Despite Gonzo's warnings, Donald dropped the soap multiple times. I personally think he enjoyed it.....

PTM: Thank you Miss Piggy for stopping by.

I want to thank my friend Johana for playing the part of Miss Piggy.

PTM Wants YOU!!

I love guest posting, whether it is me guest posting on another blog or someone guest posting here on Just the Cheese. I love blog post collaboration, it is a lot of fun. I have had many bloggers share their creative juices with me (that sounded kind of dirty). Just to name a few, there has been Golden Girl, Baby Sister, Rawknrobyn, Invisible Seductress, Geof (@ The Man-Cave) and many others.

I would like to invite YOU the reader to join me in creating a great blog post. This is an open invitation to whoever wants to guest post on 'Just the Cheese'. Don't be shy, I don't bite, unless you want me to. I usually end up doing a wacky interview with my guest posters but you never know what could happen. Also if you have an idea that you want to share with me then don't hesitate to throw it out there.

If you would like to team up just let me know in a comment or email me at reviewsyoucantuse@gmail.com.

Problems in Jellystone Park

Ranger Smith and Boo Boo have been worried about Yogi Bear for a long time now. They think his obsession with stealing picnic baskets has gotten way out of hand. They have decided to do the best thing for Yogi by staging an intervention. The Ranger and Boo Boo have brought Yogi to our studios to talk to him. Yogi doesn't know he is heading into an intervention. He thinks he is here to meet RawknRobyn and The Invisible Seductress. He is huge fans of them both and wants their autographs real bad. I, Powdered Toast Man, will be in charge of the intervention. I have no prior experience (don't tell Ranger Smith and Boo Boo that, they are paying me a hefty sum to do this) and I am just going to wing it. Shhh, here they come now.

PTM: Welcome fellas, take a seat and we will get started (Locks door behind them).

Yogi Bear: I am so excited. I have always wanted to meet RawknRobyn and Seductress. They are my favorite bloggers and I have a huge crush on one of them.

Ranger Smith: Yeah, well, I have a huge crush on  (peering at Boo Boo). I mean, how long will this take? I've got a meeting with Mrs. Possum in 15 minutes. (He sets the alarm on his watch).

  

Boo Boo:  I live directly across from Mrs Possum! In fact if I leave my window shades up she can see RIGHT in my shower but she moved out months ago! I have seen a strange realtor videotaping from the window, though they're probably just getting it ready to sell.

PTM: Well Yogi, there has been a change of plans. Unfortunately, we tricked you into coming here. You are here for a different reason. You are not here to see Robyn and Seductress. You have a serious problem and we are all here to help you

Yogi Bear: Is it because of my chronic masturbation?

PTM: Err, no but we might get back to that afterwards. Go ahead Boo Boo, tell him why he is here.

Boo Boo: Are you sure we couldn't address the chronic masturbation issue first PTM? There has not been an unviolated fruity pastry in Jellystone Park for years, and maybe the two are related! Yogi, pie violations aside, your picnic basket thievery has gotten out of hand and we are here to help you work through it.

PTM: Ranger Smith, is there anything you want to add before we get started?

Ranger Smith: (Eyeing Boo Boo, licking his lips) What? Oh, no, not a thing to add.

Yogi Bear: @#$% all of you.

.PTM: Now Yogi, there is no reason for such language. We are here to help.

Yogi Bear:  Who put you in charge anyway? And why is your head shaped like a piece of bread?

PTM: They put me in charge and I was born this way.

Boo Boo: I do see the issue here PTM. Your warm buttery accentuated head and finely sculptured abs wrapped entirely in flattering blue Lycra makes my mouth water! Are you seeing anybody?

PTM: Thank you Boo Boo for that disturbing compliment. As a side note I'm not attracted to male bears unless they are in the circus.

Ranger Smith: (Clearing his throat, sticking chest out, and unbuttoning top shirt button) Lycra is my specialty, Boo Boo

Yogi Bear: What the hell is going on here?!? How is it that I'm the one with the problem?

PTM: The first step is admitting you have a problem. Oh wait, that's the 11 step program.

Yogi Bear: Don't you mean the 12 step program you sorry excuse for a man. Are you even qualified to be running an intervention. Where did you go to college?

PTM: I didn't exactly err go to umm *cough* . Never mind me. Now where was I? Dammit you stupid ass Bear, I've lost my train of thought. Ranger Smith, put this Bear in his place while I try to figure out what I was gonna say.

Ranger Smith: Yogi, I’m afraid I need to discipline you again. Remember who’s the boss? (Wink).

Yogi Bear: I'm going to say Angela, no Tony, no definitely Angela is the boss. Mona wishes she could be the boss. Oh Alyssa Milano, if only I weren't a bear.

Boo Boo: And if only Alyssa was a warm pastry!! (Nudge, nudge) right Yogi??

PTM: Yogi,why do you feel the need to steal picnic baskets?

Yogi Bear: Probably because my dad abandoned me when I was only 6 and my mom verbally and physically abused me.

PTM: Really, wow, I didn't know that. I am so sorry.

Yogi Bear: Ahhh what a douche, you actually believed me?

PTM: That's not funny Yogi. Why can't you take this seriously?

Yogi Bear: Did you hear they took the word gullible out of the dictionary? You should check.

PTM: I already fell for that when Fred Flintstone got me with it. I'm not falling for it again.

Yogi Bear: Hey Boo Boo, do you believe this guy? What an arse!

Ranger Smith: (Looking up "gullible" in his handy pocket dictionary.)  Mmmhmm, just as I suspected. It's right here on page 58, with a little picture of me. Look, Boo Boo. (Whispering) You can't tell from the photo, but I was wearing blue Lycra underneath my uniform. (Wink, wink).

Boo Boo: Can I lick your cheek PTM?

PTM: Okay Boo Boo you can get one lick but that's it.

(Boo Boo spreads a little butter on PTM's cheek and slowly licks it off. He then tries to caress PTM's abs).

PTM: (slapping Boo Boo's paw) Keep your hands off my abs, you can look but not touch.

Boo Boo:  Yogi, I think maybe our relationship has come to a climax (Stares lovingly at PTM).

Yogi Bear: But Boo Boo who is going to be my catcher on those cold, cold nights? You have always been there to help relieve my "stress".

Boo Boo: Those are not my fondest of memories and we promised NOT to speak of it!! We NEVER need to speak of it!!

PTM: I am curious to know the details of those events. It seems like you two have a lot of unresolved issues that you need to work out. I would like to have you too back here another time to discuss them.

(Boo, Boo hides in the corner and starts sobbing)

Ranger Smith: (His watch alarm goes off) Time's up. I gotta go. I can't keep a good Possum waiting, fellas if you know what I mean. I’ll catch you later, Boo Boo (Wink, wink).

PTM: Well, I suppose we will end the intervention there. No use continuing without the Ranger. Next time we will have Chuck Norris in to discuss why he wouldn't let Ranger Smith become a Texas Ranger.

Yogi Bear: Are we going to talk about my masturbation problem now?

PTM: No Yogi, I'm sorry but we are all out of time for today. Call up my secretary tomorrow and schedule a meeting. I will see if Dr. Phil is available to sit down with us. He owes me a favor after I took care of that "problem" that him and Oprah had.

Yogi Bear: In that case I need to use the bathroom. (He runs off into the bathroom with a huge erection).

PTM:  (whispers to himself) I need to find another line of work. I wonder if the Red Lobster is still hiring?

I want to throw out a big thanks to RawknRobyn and The Invisible Seductress for lending their talents for this intervention. Robyn played the part of Ranger Smith and Seductress played the part of Boo Boo. Thank you girls, you were awesome as always. I played the parts of PTM and Yogi Bear. I hope Yogi finds the help he needs. 

Inside the Actor's Studio

Today we have a special guest in the studio. Appearing for his first interview ever, give a warm welcome for Jason Voorhees. (Very few applause, shock on everyone's face)

PTM: It is nice to have to hear Jason. Is it alright if I call you Jason or do you prefer Mr. Voorhees?

Jason: You can call me whatever you want...just don't call me late to a slaughter. I'm sorry I know that was a bad joke. But you know that I am not known for my humor.

PTM: Now Jason you have appeared as the main character in the Friday the 13th series. That must have been very lucrative for you. How have you spent your money?

 Jason: Sadly I did not spend my money wisely. While I originally had plans to invest in the stock market, I wound up spending a large portion to acquire Crystal Lake from the previous owners and perform some upkeep on a yearly basis. Even though I say "some" upkeep, the camp is damn near 100 acres, so it gets pricey. Add in the marketing and advertising to keep importing kids to this camp to slaughter every summer and then add on the payola and hush money I pay out to the local authorities to keep these killing sprees under wraps and I am in the red by year's end. Oh and don't forget my coke habit. Why do you think I wear the same clothes all of the time and live in that ghetto ass shack? I mean, I would love to get one of those new age hockey masks with the cage, but I just don't have the bread.   

PTM: Out of all the movies including the one with Freddy Kruger, which Friday the 13th is your favorite and why?

 Jason: Great question! I would have to say the 8th installment, Jason Takes Manhattan, but for selfish reasons. I have always wanted to visit New York and that was my one and only chance. The producers put me up at the Plaza, took me to Nobu and I brought the sun up at Marquee with my co-star Dansen Jaggett, who is a bit of freak if you know what I mean,

PTM: What was the deal with Jason X? Were you in desperate need of some cash? I mean my 90 year old grandmother could of made a better script.

 Jason: Well Mr. Toast Man, after The Final Friday in '93, I hit a rough patch in my life. In Hollywood, if you are out of sight, you are out of mind. People stopped talking about me and stopped dressing like me for Halloween. And then that asshole Kevin Williamson made Scream , which established a new horror icon in Ghostface and left me as an afterthought. I missed the attention and all of the parties that go along with it. So I fell in with some bad people and turned to drugs and booze as a full-time hobby. And that can be very costly for someone like me who can never die. I can have a fatal overdose and be back on the horse 20 minutes later. Money was tight when the creators of Jason X came around to offer me the gig. I didn't read the script at all and mailed in my performance. But imagine my disappointment when I found out we really weren't going into outer space. Talk about FAIL.

PTM: Out of these 3 females who would you fuck, marry and kill? Kathy Griffin, Sarah Silverman and Martha Washington.

 Jason: Silverman, Washington, Griffin. Silverman is the hottest so that's a no-brainer and Washington looks a lot like my mother...and you know I am a major mama's boy. So I'd kill Griffin by default...but can you kill something that's already dead? Or should I say someone with a dead career?

PTM: Do you have any plans to settle down, marry and have some kids?

 Jason: Unfortunately I have no dick. It fell off permanently when I was blown apart in Jason X. Just kidding! No I don't want a wife or kids to cramp my style. I am all about the party and banging chicks anyways. Like the great Aldous Snow once said, "I want to get lost in fuck." Wait can I say fuck?

PTM: Sure you can. We don't censor here at Just the Cheese. The only exceptions are Justin Bieber and Philadelphia Eagles fans. I'm going to play psychiatrist for a minute now. Why do you feel it necessary to hide behind a mask?

 Jason: Have you seen my face? It looks like vomit from a cat who ate a diseased rabbit and a whole can of cranberry sauce. More importantly, it really turns off the ladies.

PTM: What is your favorite board game?   

Jason: Clue. But people hate playing it with me. I don't get the whole cat-and-mouse hush-hush deal with the game. I am very vocal and tell other players straight off the bat that I killed everyone in the house with my machete. What are they gonna do about it? I will "slash a bitch" if someone steps to me. Oh and I like Chutes and Ladders too.

PTM: How do you think you would do in a fight against Warwick Davis as the Leprechaun?

 Jason: Haha that's a joke right? Leprechaun is the Church's Chicken of horror film icons. Me...no contest.

PTM: Do you miss your mom? I hear that you kept her decapitated head, is this just a rumor?

 Jason: Yes it's true and I sleep with it every night. I get emotional when I talk about it, but my mom never put up with anyone's shit and always had my back. That mentality got her head cut off and I felt so guilty. If I was just a little older, her and I would be the best man-woman killing team since Bonnie and Clyde. I love my mommy!

PTM: Have you ever visited The Man Cave blog formerly Enter the Man-Cave? If so, what do you think of Geof?

Jason: Ugh. That P.O.S. site? It is about as lifeless as my skin. And yeah I know Geof. He's a talentless hack who can't spell the name Jeff correctly. Don't hang out with him if you want to live long because he's a worse animal then me. And tell him that he still owes me that boat he lost to me in our card game.

PTM: That is all the time we have for today. I want to thank Jason for stopping by and giving us insight into the mind of a psychopath. I don't think I will be able to sleep tonight.

I want to thank Geof from The Man Cave for playing the part of Jason Voorhees. Make sure you stop by his blog and say hi.

What is Santa up to now?

I kind of slacked on the blogging this week. I had a lot of homework to do. Hopefully it will pick up next week. Now go check me out at Life by Chocolate where I am involved in the Mr. and Mrs. Claus divorce scandal. If you want to know more click HERE.

I Got Good News and Gooder-er News

The good news is that this blog has 100 fewer calories and 4 grams less fat, so take a few extra bites if you want. The gooder-er news is that I am guest posting over at THE INVISIBLE SEDUCTRESS today along with another blogger buddy, RawknRobyn. You will laugh, you will cry, you will hopefully pee your pants a little. The topic at hand is the controversy regarding Pluto and Goofy. Want to know more? Hop on over there by clicking HERE or HERE but not HERE.

If for some reason you are too lazy to click on a link then scroll back a post and read my Monday Minute.

The Movie Game with Guest Host Passionofthemom

Today I have a special surprise (well not a surprise cuz I told you about it on Monday). Passionofthemom is guest posting the movie game. She won the movie game so this is her prize. Now she worked hard on creating these questions so even if you don't know them you should still leave a comment for her. You will be emailing her your answers, not me. Email answers to Passionofthemom@gmail.com. Answers will be posted on Friday.

RULES: I present you with two movies, for example: The Matrix and Miss Congeniality. The object of the game is to link them together to another movie by connecting the actors/actresses. The link in this case is Speed using Keanu Reeves from The Matrix and Sandra Bullock from Miss Congeniality. Another example is: Link Top Gun & The Shining. The answer is A Few Good Men, using Tom Cruise from Top Gun and Jack Nicholson from The Shining. Get it?

Now they all aren't this easy and sometimes there are multiple answers. The questions range from easy to hard and sometimes I like to throw in a challenging one to test those true movie buffs. You earn points for correct answers and I keep track of every one's points on the side of my blog. There is going to be a prize awarded to the winner. Try not to use the Internet. This is a game of memory and skill. I ONLY ACCEPT ANSWERS IN THE FORM OF AN EMAIL, DO NOT PUT YOUR ANSWERS IN A COMMENT, LET EVERYONE HAVE A FAIR CHANCE AT PLAYING. EMAIL ANSWERS TO Passionofthemom@gmail.com. GOOD LUCK!!

Easy -- The In-Laws (2003) to EdTV (1 point)

Medium -- Better Off Dead to Beethoven (2 points)

Hard -- Soapdish to Wayne's World (3 points)

Challenge -- The Good Shepherd to Tenacious D in The Pick Of Destiny to Primal Fear (5 points)

Here is the new addition to the game. It's sort of like the 6 degrees of Kevin Bacon but instead of using Mr. Bacon I am going to give you 2 random actors/actresses and you have to find the quickest link using movies. For example: Will Smith to Al Pacino. The answer could be: Will Smith in Men in Black with Tommy Lee Jones who is in Batman Forever with Chris O'Donnell who is in Scent of a Woman with Al Pacino. If you finding a quicker link than good for you. The less movies you use, the more points you get.

Link: Anton Yelchin to Justin Bartha

Link: BJ Novak to Kristen Wiig

Points are as follows:
In same movie together: 5 points
Using 2 movies: 4 points
3 movies: 3 points
4 movies: 2 points

Battle of the Cereal Mascots: Semi-Finals Round One

Today is the first round of the semi-finals. In the last battle Tony the Tiger basically mauled Cap'n Crunch and made him eat his own hat. After the match Cap'n Crunch was rushed to the hospital but it was too late, they couldn't save his hat.

In today's match we have Snap, Crackle & Pop versus Toucan Sam. As per the rules in the first battle the Rice Krispies boys can only fight one at a time and tag out when they want to, there will be no ganging up on Toucan Sam. Since I already interviewed both of these characters, I wanted to get the opinions of some fellow co-workers. Before the fight I interview the Janitor and Camera Man #3.

VS

PTM: How do you feel about today's combatants?
Janitor: Those dweebs? I’ve seen more roughhousing at the Mormon Tabernacle Choir Rehearsals.

PTM: What do you use to clean up blood after the match?

Janitor: It’s this cool trick my mama taught me called the Sponge Bob Band-aid.

PTM: In your professional opinion, how much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

Janitor: That’s a hard one. Let me see (takes calculator out of his shirt pocket and begins punching in numbers..scratches forehead..scratches forehead again..). 3!

PTM: On a cold winter night, do you prefer the taste of Rice Krispies or Froot Loops?

Janitor: Hell, if I’m gonna eat that **** at all, it ain’t gonna happen on a cold winter night. I’m just sayin’.

PTM: Camera Man #3 has been talking smack about you for the past week. How do you feel about that?

Janitor: Man, that dude’s lens is so small. He’s just jealous of my equipment – if you know what I mean.

PTM: One last question, Can you shampoo the couch that's in my office? RawknRobyn and Camera Man #2 left some stains on it last night.

Janitor: RawknRobyn? Dang, she acts all sweet and innocent. No wonder they call her “Rawkn” (said with an elbow nudge). Don’t worry about the stains, man. I’ll just pour red wine onto it, and you won’t see them anymore. It’s a little trick I learned while working at the White House in the 90’s.

PTM: Is it true that you have a gold statue of Toucan Sam in your house?

Camera Man #3: Yeah, in the corner of my bedroom. His nose is so long, he’s my idol!

PTM: Does it bother you that RawknRobyn is fooling around with Camera Man #2?

Camera Man #3: Nah, the only thing that bothers me about her (‘cuz she’s pretty damn near perfect, actually) is that she writes all this crap about celibacy on her blog, like she’s some hoity toity expert on the matter. I’m telling you, that little hot number doesn’t know the first thing about celibacy.

PTM: Did you vote for Obama?

Camera Man #3: Who’s that?

PTM: Why do you have a problem with the janitor?

Camera Man #3: One night when I was putting my equipment away, he walked by pointing and laughing at my lens, saying he never saw one so small. It really hurt my feelings. You know? Gotta tissue?

PTM: Have you always wanted to be a camera man since you were a little kid?

Camera Man #3: Nah, I just always wanted a bigger lens. I thought I might get one this way.

PTM: Okay, final question. What do you think of these shoes? I stole them out of Cap'n Crunch's locker last week.

Camera Man #3: Dude, those are some big, long shoes. I’m impressed (said while giving PTM a high-five).

I want to thank RawknRobyn from Life by Chocolate for playing the Janitor and Camera Man #3. If you don't follow her blog already then there is something wrong with you. Now the most important part, it's time to vote. And you are not voting for the Janitor or Camera Man #3, don't forget the battle is between Snap, Crackle & Pop and Toucan Sam. Polls close on Sunday at 11:57pm. The next round will commence next Tuesday. Come back tomorrow for Passionofthemom's Movie Game Guest Post.

Inside the Actor's Studio

We have a special treat for you today. First, I will be filling in for James Lipton, he has come down with a bad case of Pacaderm flu. Second, today on the show we have a special guest. Wile E. Coyote has dropped by to give us a look inside his real life.

PTM (Powdered Toast Man): First off, I want to thank you ahead of time for taking some time out of your busy life to talk to us about the real you.

Wile E Coyote: Not at all my good sir, not at all. Glad to be a part of such an illustrious tradition.

PTM: My first question I know is on every one's mind. What does the "E" stand for in Wile E. Coyote?

Wile E. Coyote: It doesn't. That is to say, it doesn't stand for anything. Wile is a common coyote name. When I first started out in the business, Hollywood was flooded with so many other coyotes that you had to find a way to stand out. That E got me my first job.

PTM: Interesting., I thought it stood for Egbert. What is your life like when you aren't chasing the Road Runner?

Wile E. Coyote: I'm chasing down life. Last year I participated in a triathlon. I was the oldest contestant there. Sure I only placed fourth, but it's not about winning, it's about giving what you've got and enjoying what you're given.

PTM: Good for you. Do you have any kids?

Wile E. Coyote: [smiling] I'm proud to say that I am the father of 3 wonderful kids. I also have 16 grandchildren and 31 great grand children. It was 32 but my son mistook one of the children late at night for a pot roast and devoured it.

PTM: I'm sure that kid tasted like pot roast. Are you friends with Road Runner off the set?

Wile E. Coyote: That depends on which one you mean. In all there have been 7 Road Runners. I was close to the original till he died last year. The other 6... well maybe the last one. The rest though were royal pricks.

PTM: I had no idea, they all looked the same to me. Do you do your own stunts? If yes, have you ever gotten hurt?

Wile E. Coyote: Yes and yes. You may remember about 20 years back I won that lawsuit against Acme after nearly killing myself with their rocket roller skates. We wrote the scene where I slam into the wall, into the script. But that shot was real, as was the pain.

PTM: I ordered those skates once, they were hard to use and there was no instruction manual. If you could make a career change right now, what would you do?

Wile E. Coyote: At this age my next move is to retire [laughs] but I'll tell you, when I was a young pup I considered becoming a chef. I was vegan before anyone knew what that meant. I think I could have revolutionized the world of professional cuisine.

PTM: A vegan coyote? Now I've heard everything. I heard a rumor that your wife had an affair with Foghorn Leghorn, is that true?

Wile E. Coyote: [looking wistfully towards the stage lights] Claire was always looking for something. When she couldn't find it with me, she looked elsewhere. I haven't seen her in a few years now. I just hope she found whatever she was looking for.

PTM: That's sad, I would of eaten that over sized rooster. Do you get tired of chasing that Road Runner? Do you wish that they would just end it and let you catch him?

Wile E. Coyote: No, not all. Everyone knows people lose interest in a show when something actually happens. It's all about the tease.

PTM: Like how Trix Rabbit doesn't get the cereal. This last question is from one of our audience members, Gayle Prudent from High Ridge, Colorado writes: I love you Wile, you are the reason why I became an Ostrich farmer. My question is, how do you feel about Linda McMahon running for senator of Connecticut?

Wile E. Coyote: What does it matter? Everyone knows the senate is fake. Real politics happen in the house.

PTM: Well said sir. Well that's all the time we have today.I want to thank Wile for sitting down with us today and also for not eating any of my camera men.

Wile E. Coyote was played by T.S from The Non-Review, he also came up with the idea of it being "Inside the Actor's Studio". I (PTM) came up with the questions. I am sure you all follow T.S. by now but go give him some love anyway but first give me some love.

If you haven't yet go vote on the 3rd round of the battle of the cereal mascots. Polls close on Sunday at 11:59pm.

Something else to enjoy.

Special Guest Interview

As you may all have read I did two guest posts on Life by Chocolate for RawknRobyn, one was about the new Pretzel m&m's and the other about the new Coconut m&m's. Robyn is here today for an interview to review the interviews that we had. I have restrained Robyn in her interview chair so she doesn't attack my camera man.

PTM: So Robyn which interview do you think went better and why?

RR: Wow, Powdered Toast Man, you don't let up with the intrusive questions. Do you? Well, I hope this doesn't taint my reputation, but I admit I was under psychiatric scrutiny during the pretzel m&m interview. When we went to commercial break, the doctor tripled my dose. My hallucinations of Gilligan and the Professor were kind of fuzzy back then. You know how that goes! I was fully stabilized, as you could probably tell, by the time of our coconut m&m interview. I believe that interview was much more sensible because of it, and I enjoyed it three times as much.

PTM: I totally understand. I just took some Ritalin with the Janitor. Thanks Frank!

Did anything I say during the interviews shock you?

RR: Hmm, it's kind of hard to remember, because you do tend to drone on and on about the most obvious, mundane details. What with mentioning that the coconut m&m doesn't make for a good suppository, and it tastes better than Viagra, and BLAH BLAH BLAH. I tell ya, it was hard for me to stay awake. I was a tad shocked, though, when you described the pretzel m&m as "Chuck Norris." Most of my interviewees mention Danny DeVito instead. So, that just kind of threw me off a bit. Thank goodness my meds have kicked in since then.

PTM: I have tasted Danny DeVito, he is less salty than Chuck Norris. Danny has more of an almond flavor.

Is it true that you were paid by the Mars Company to conduct those interviews? If yes, how much did they give you?

RR: No, actually, the Uranus Company made the offer, provided I'd set the stage for your comment about suppositories. Uranus had no money for me. Budget cuts and all. Instead, I got two cases of Viagra. It's not too bad, especially since I hate grocery shopping. As you said, though, coconut m&m are tastier. At any rate, my connection with Uranus made for good experience. I don't take it for granted.

PTM: I spoke with the Uranus Company before the show and they said they have never met you or even heard of you before. I think you were hallucinating again.

Have you had a chance to try the coconut m&m's yet?

RR: Oh yes. I shared a sampling with Camera Man #3. One night, he saw me nibbling on them and started salivating. He then leaned over and grabbed some. The memory is blurry after that, as trauma goes. I think he puked and mumbled something about joining another team. He said he preferred your pretzel to my coconuts. I like my coconut m&m's. They're very sweet. This is really difficult to relive. Do you have a tissue?

PTM: We are stricken with budget cuts too, no tissues. Just wipe your tears on your chair. I will loosen the restraints for you.

In only 4 1/2 words describe Camera Man #3.

RR: Big, big, big, big *!

PTM: You do know that he has a glandular problem?

If you were stuck on a deserted island what cheese flavored food would you want to eat?

RR: Well, that's a no-brainer. I can't believe you need to ask. I'd go for Swiss Miss Instant Cocoa.

PTM: Oh I forgot about the cheesiness of Swiss Miss, that takes me back to Kindergarten.

That's all the time we have for today. It's time for Robyn's chocolate shot, she gets cranky without it, I want to thank Camera Man #3 for not filing that lawsuit against Robyn. (I told him it was the meds talking). If you haven't read the interviews on Life by Chocolate, you can go HERE and HERE.

Have we found the one?

This is Golden Girl (aka Nicole) coming to you live from Powdered Toast Headquarters with a wedding update for all those interested in the planning. However, before I get to the good details, I must say a few things. First off…for those of you who think I am a heartless person who doesn’t comment on the posts toast man writes about me, it's true I don’t comment, because I am not a fan of blogger. I tell him in person what I think of his posts. The only reason I am writing on this blog now and comment the rare times that I actually do is to make him happy. In a relationship, there must be some give and take…and this is apparently my give.

I guess I will get started now. I would love to tell you all about our latest adventure in wedding planning. We went out to visit this place called Green Tree Country Club in New Rochelle (New York). Actually, we went and saw this other catering place first, which I’m not even gonna talk about because its not worth mentioning. Anyways back to Green Apple…I mean Green Tree. This is the place I want to get married at. When we were in this place, I got butterflies in my stomach. This place is a historical landmark, a beautiful mansion over 100 years old. This very nice, charming old man and his wife bought this place and turned it into a magnificent wedding/event venue. This place has all original stuff…its HUGE! They have their own huge kitchen and bakery. They even have their own $400,000 back up generator that can probably light up the whole city in the event of a power outage….and the food possibilities are endless.

This is a family run place and the man who bought it is so cute. He is an older gentlemen (ask toast man, I love old men) and I think he took a liking to me, or at least did a very good job selling that feeling to me. What I liked about his style was that he took us on a tour first before going over prices and all that jazz. He is definitely a family man because he was showing us pictures of his grandchildren and telling us about his kids. It feels like our every whim would be met here.

We walked out to the ceremony site where we would actually get married, in the gardens, with a beach backdrop. At every other place we looked, I felt that the aisle was too short…I would like a decent walk…not a mile for god sakes, but I don’t wanna rush, take 3 steps and be at the altar either. This place was just right. The ballrooms where the party would be are huge and each are classic and I know we could really rock the house. I’m getting goose pimples thinking about it again.

The only downfall to this place would be the pricing. But compared to everywhere we have seen, this place takes the cake and has the best deals. No ceremony fee or extra gratuity, nor does he except kickbacks from other vendors. What we pay is just the price per plate plus tax and any extra food tables we want that are not included. Its $125 per plate…a lil more then I wanted…I just don’t know if I will find a place that will give me that feeling again. I DON’T WANT TO SETTLE!

Thinking about marrying toast man gives me the best feeling inside. I see myself walking down the aisle to him and becoming Mrs. Powdered Toast Man. I think about it everyday. I cant wait to be a wife and mother. I love you with all my heart and soul, especially when you hold me close like you did at Green Tree by the water. I know no matter what happens or where we end up, walking down the aisle to you will be the happiest moment of my life.

This is Golden Girl signing off from Powdered Toast Headquarters and remember, I shall call him Squishy and he shall be mine.

The Movie Game Guest Post

Today's Movie Game is brought to you by Nippy the Penguin from Crazy Penguin Ramblings. This is his prize for being the top dog of the movie game. He gets to create his own questions with no help from me. He is also a movie buff so I'm sure his questions are challenging and fun. Since Nippy is running the show this time, please EMAIL ANSWERS TO draydencrystalfyre@yahoo.com, no putting your answers in a comment. Don't ruin it for everyone else.

The winner of this Movie Game will be awarded the chance to help me with the next round of movie game questions.

If you have never played before or need a refresher, read ahead...

You are presented with two movies, for example: Independence Day and U.S. Marshalls. The object of the game is to link them together using another movie by connecting the actors/actresses. The link in this case is Men In Black using Will Smith from Independence Day and Tommy Lee Jones from U.S. Marshalls. Now they all aren't this easy and sometimes there are multiple answers. The questions range from easy to challenging. Good luck!!

Easy - Link : X-Men & Transformers

Medium - Link: RocknRolla & Snake Eyes

Hard - Link: Iron Man & Little Nicky

Challenge - Link: Charlie's Angels & Elf & 16 Blocks

NEW Super Duper Challenge : Try linking the two quotes via the movie they appear in to the other. Same premise as above but instead of being given the movies, you must first figure it out what movies they are in by the quote then link them. This question will be worth 12 points

"There's something out there waiting for us, and it ain't no man. We're all gonna die." & "Oh, what large teeth you have. I mean white sparkly teeth, I know you probably hear this all the time from your food but you must bleach or something, 'cause that's one dazzling smile you got there and do I detect a hint of minty freshness?"

Remember to email Nippy @ draydencrystalfyre@yahoo.com. I am a contestant this week. I am playing along too. Go check out Nippy's blog when you get a chance. Answers will post Friday morning. The Movie Game is taking a break for a few weeks. It will be back sooner than you know it. If you just came in late, go check out all the old Movie Game posts.

Mega Man vs. Earthworm Jim

Today's pros and cons post is brought to you by my buddy Nippy the Penguin from Crazy Penguin Ramblings. He just started writing on his blog again and I wanted to give him a nice plug. He is still kind of new to blogging but we won't hold that against him. So after you read his guest post, go check out his cool blog. If you folks like him, I will have him back to write more stuff. BTW I love Mega Man. Enjoy!

We all Have our preferences when it comes to our beloved video game characters, so today I decided to take two of my favorite characters and pit them against one another in a Pro Vs. Con Match up to determine the Ultimate winner.

First up we have Mega Man also known as the Blue Bomber or Rockman in Japan.

Mega Man

Pros

*First off he has a friggin' laser cannon for a hand!! How cool would that be to have? And you can charge it up for those extra large jobs.

*He absorbs the abilities of his fallen foes taking in their strengths to take down others.

*Never has to age and deal with those achy joints or someone trying to sell him some damned age defying creams.

*Has a robot dog named Rush as a faithful sidekick. Imagine if he were trained like Chopper from Stand By Me, that's one helluva clamp that junkyard dog would have. Oh yeah did I mention the dog enabled you to fly?

Cons

* Cute female lead in your game is your sister and although the Japanese are freaky they aren't like our southern Hill Billies. Sorry Mega Man no robo booty for you. No amount of enemy power absorption is gonna get rid of that blue!

*Forever stuck as a child which brings us to our next con.

* Dr. Light seems to get an awful lot of joy from popping open his chassis and taking him for a spin, that poor little robo boy.

Earthworm Jim

Pros

* He has a super suit that makes him really strong , and a really big ray gun ....... sorry got caught going off into his cartoon theme song.

* Can totally use himself as a whip which has worked well in his current career as an Asexual Dominatrix.

*Has a loyal side kick named Peter Puppy and let's face it, chicks dig cute puppies.

* His suit also works as a huge storage compartment for all his gear which he currently rents out to a large group of interstellar illegal aliens. Gotta make some extra cash with no game revenue coming in.

Cons

* That cute adorable puppy we spoke of earlier goes into random roid rages on Jim whenever he gets slightly hurt, making for some interesting hospital visits especially after Jim had watched the movie Road Trip.

* Princess Whats-her-face will forever be beyond Jim's grasp. After all he is still just an earthworm but hey some chicks might be into that.

* Only 2 major games of note and no current games in development that I am aware of, which is unfortunate.

It was a long and arduous decision but I would have to go ahead and declare Mega Man the Winner. Besides where else can you find a boss character named Boomer Kawanger? This is Nippy the Penguin signing off. Until next time my fine feathered friends keep on sliding along the icy shores of life!