Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Battle of the Cereal Mascots: Semi-Finals Round One

Today is the first round of the semi-finals. In the last battle Tony the Tiger basically mauled Cap'n Crunch and made him eat his own hat. After the match Cap'n Crunch was rushed to the hospital but it was too late, they couldn't save his hat.

In today's match we have Snap, Crackle & Pop versus Toucan Sam. As per the rules in the first battle the Rice Krispies boys can only fight one at a time and tag out when they want to, there will be no ganging up on Toucan Sam. Since I already interviewed both of these characters, I wanted to get the opinions of some fellow co-workers. Before the fight I interview the Janitor and Camera Man #3.


PTM: How do you feel about today's combatants?
Janitor: Those dweebs? I’ve seen more roughhousing at the Mormon Tabernacle Choir Rehearsals.

PTM: What do you use to clean up blood after the match?

Janitor: It’s this cool trick my mama taught me called the Sponge Bob Band-aid.

PTM: In your professional opinion, how much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
Janitor: That’s a hard one. Let me see (takes calculator out of his shirt pocket and begins punching in numbers..scratches forehead..scratches forehead again..). 3!

PTM: On a cold winter night, do you prefer the taste of Rice Krispies or Froot Loops?

Janitor: Hell, if I’m gonna eat that **** at all, it ain’t gonna happen on a cold winter night. I’m just sayin’.

PTM: Camera Man #3 has been talking smack about you for the past week. How do you feel about that?
Janitor: Man, that dude’s lens is so small. He’s just jealous of my equipment – if you know what I mean.

PTM: One last question, Can you shampoo the couch that's in my office? RawknRobyn and Camera Man #2 left some stains on it last night.

Janitor: RawknRobyn? Dang, she acts all sweet and innocent. No wonder they call her “Rawkn” (said with an elbow nudge). Don’t worry about the stains, man. I’ll just pour red wine onto it, and you won’t see them anymore. It’s a little trick I learned while working at the White House in the 90’s.

PTM: Is it true that you have a gold statue of Toucan Sam in your house?

Camera Man #3: Yeah, in the corner of my bedroom. His nose is so long, he’s my idol!

PTM: Does it bother you that RawknRobyn is fooling around with Camera Man #2?

Camera Man #3: Nah, the only thing that bothers me about her (‘cuz she’s pretty damn near perfect, actually) is that she writes all this crap about celibacy on her blog, like she’s some hoity toity expert on the matter. I’m telling you, that little hot number doesn’t know the first thing about celibacy.

PTM: Did you vote for Obama?

Camera Man #3: Who’s that?

Why do you have a problem with the janitor?

Camera Man #3: One night when I was putting my equipment away, he walked by pointing and laughing at my lens, saying he never saw one so small. It really hurt my feelings. You know? Gotta tissue?

PTM: Have you always wanted to be a camera man since you were a little kid?

Camera Man #3: Nah, I just always wanted a bigger lens. I thought I might get one this way.

PTM: Okay, final question. What do you think of these shoes? I stole them out of Cap'n Crunch's locker last week.

Camera Man #3: Dude, those are some big, long shoes. I’m impressed (said while giving PTM a high-five).

I want to thank RawknRobyn from Life by Chocolate for playing the Janitor and Camera Man #3. If you don't follow her blog already then there is something wrong with you. Now the most important part, it's time to vote. And you are not voting for the Janitor or Camera Man #3, don't forget the battle is between Snap, Crackle & Pop and Toucan Sam. Polls close on Sunday at 11:57pm. The next round will commence next Tuesday. Come back tomorrow for Passionofthemom's Movie Game Guest Post.


Anonymous said...

You know, I really don't like to stick my beak in other people's business, but I'm going to have to vote for Toucan Sam. - G

Bossy Betty said...

Toucan Sam. Did you really have to ask?

Ian said...

Toucan Sam

Baby Sister said...

Toucan Sam. Hands down.

Know where I can get me a golden statue? Hmm...

Rawknrobyn.blogspot.com said...

Hey, what happened to my vote? It disappeared. There's something fishy about this whole thing, if you ask me. I voted for RawknRobyn
-CameraMan#2 and #3 (we do everything together)

Blasé said...

I'm not sure what's going on over here...but RawkinRobyn's got my vote any day of the year.

Edlund said...

Hey powdered toast man...you rock!

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

Gotta be the bird!

Kimberly Walker said...

Hey Mr Toast,
Sorry but the cream cheese squares I left at my boyfriends place. I didn't want to be tempted to eat one.
All the best,

The Invisible Seductress said...


Marlene said...

TOUCAN for sure!

Rawkn Robyn RAWKS....even if she's not the celibate little wonder she pretends to be. ;)

m. said...


Cheeseboy said...


And what a great sport Robyn is.

Wreckless Euroafrican said...

Got to vote for the bird. He's gonna beak the rest into extinction! As for Rawky - well, I'm not surprised she messed the couch, that babe messes with our heads!
C U Soon! Salagatle!

Pat Tillett said...

Gotta stick with my boys...

Nippy The Penguin said...

Snap, Crackle and Pop all the way.