Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Where Are They Now?

This series accounts the lives and events of people that were once famous and now you don’t know what they are doing. I’m here to give you the lowdown.

I am here to tell you what actually happened to Clara Peller. You probably don’t recognize her name but once I tell you what her tagline was you will know. She is famous for the line “Where’s the beef?”  The Wendy’s chain started this slogan back in 1984. Clara was featured in their commercials where she purchased a burger with big buns from a fictional fast food restaurant and exclaimed “where’s the beef?” while opening up the buns.

Now if you look up Clara, it will tell you that she died in 1987. This is a cover up. The truth is that after months of doing those commercials Clara went bat shit crazy. All she could dream about was hamburgers and she kept going up to random strangers asking “where’s the beef?” At first they thought she was just being colorful but it started to get out of hand. One time she showed up to one of the sets completely nude and was asking the kitchen appliances where the beef was. Clara had to be hospitalized. In order to save face and continue with their advertising Wendy’s decided to clone Clara. Any commercial featuring Clara after August of 1984 was of her clone and not her.

The clone worked out very well for Wendy’s until in 1987 it spontaneously combusted. It was reported that the real Clara Peller died in her home town in Chicago when it was actually her clone. Clara spent the next years in a mental institution until she escaped in 1993. No one knows the whereabouts of Clara. There were a few “sightings” in 1996, 1997 and 1999 but nothing was confirmed. Nobody knows if she is alive or dead. She would be 109 if she’s still roaming around out there. If you have seen her or know the whereabouts of Clara please don’t tell anyone. The Wendy’s Corporation doesn’t want to know. Also don’t ask how I know all of this information, I have my sources…. Cough…Kermit the frog…cough



If you want to read the first Where Are They Now? Click HERE

18 comments:

Rosalind said...

She really is my Grandmother from another Mother... love that old broad.

Unknown said...

Her soul will not rest until she finds the beef....

Oilfield Trash said...

She is in cahoots with the Dunkin Donuts dude and the Maytag repair man.

Pat Tillett said...

I heard she had plastic surgery to change her identity and later became the "help, I've fallen and I can't get up lady."

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

Maybe that's why cloning never took off.

Pearl said...

Over from Oilfield Trash.

Pretty damn funny!

Pearl

Unknown said...

That Kermit Frog really does have some good scoop! I should ask him more questions. I remember that commercial well. I was 9 years old when it came out. Now, I just say "Where's the REAL beef?" when I go there. Not sure what they're serving there these days...

The Empress said...

Hi Powdered Toast Man! Oilfield Trash sent me. Thanks for solving the Clara mystery. Consider me a new fan.

The Ranter's Box

Ms. A said...

Where's the beef?... (between your teeth!) I remember her well.

Bushman said...

That's ironic because I heard the very same story from my hamster except he left out the clone thing. Of course I was feeding him and I couldn't hear his words around a stalk of celery. I'll have to listen better I guess maybe he isn't crazy!

Baby Sister said...

I love those commercials. They crack me up. I hope her soul can find peace soon.

Rawknrobyn.blogspot.com said...

She lives forever. I love that woman. I'm going to fry up some burgers tonight in hopes she'll come around.
xoRobyn

Elizabeth Mueller said...

So that's the beef on Clara? Poor thing.

♥.•*¨Elizabeth¨*•.♥
Can Alex save Winter from the darkness that hunts her?
YA Paranormal Romance, Darkspell coming fall of 2011!

Bossy Betty said...

I think I saw her at 7-11 watching the rolling hot dogs.

Jo-Anne's Ramblings said...

I saw her at my grandmothers nursing home wondering around asking where's the beef. I didn't know who she was till now so thank you for telling me, I promise not to tell anyone else where she is......really I will not go to the nursing home and stir her up either as I am a nice lady.......
I know you don't know me but after a while you will get to know me then you will know how nice I am or as I have always said just go and ask anyone who has just met me and they will tell you I am nice........
just do not ask my family they will tell you the truth...........

m. said...

this is excellent.

Violet said...

i SWEAR to gawd, this lady almost ran me off the hiway last week.
ghosts of grannies past shouldn't drive

Jeff Beesler said...

I have a beef with this commercial. It's that I remember that burger all too well. Eww...thirty year old burger...