Thursday, May 6, 2010

Retro Post: Car 54, where are you?

This was my 4th post ever back in August of 2009. I don't think anybody read it, so here is it's rebirth. If you have read it already then cheers to you for searching through my archives.

Ever wonder if you could buy an ambulance? Well you sure can, I have witnessed it first hand. I live with someone that decided it would be a good investment to get a '93 Ford...errr...well ambulance. Why you ask, well to have some sort of a mobile shed. That's always been my dream. Now owning an ambulance might have been cool when you were like 5 but at 50 it's kinda sad. Also when you buy a used ambulance they disconnect the lights and sirens, who the hell wants that? Now to actually own one of these beauts you first have to be a redneck or at least have a little redneck blood pumpin' through your veins.

Now my girlfriend Nicole makes a very valid point about this subject. She wonders how many people died in that thing and what diseases and germs are still floating around in there? I hope whoever sold it (I'm guessing a hospital and not another redneck before him) soaked that shit in some bleach. There might be some sort of new super virus growing in that thing, like a mix of SARS and swine flu with a trace of the plague, yeah that's still going around.

I know what you're thinking, that having an ambulance might be cool. It is actually a huge eye sore like having a giant naked statue of yourself in your yard, nobody wants to see that everyday. This thing also attracts all the ladies, I heard someone installed a pussy magnet in it. "Now if I buy this Hummer you will install pussy magnet...." Now who doesn't love a good Borat joke. I love that movie, i still haven't seen Bruno yet but i heard it's pretty funny but that's for another entry. What was I talking about...? Oh yeah having your own mobile shed. The only time it is acceptable to have your own ambulance is if you are one of the Ghostbusters or Jay Leno (I'm sure he has one).

I found one on Ebay if anybody is intrigued after reading this, only $1800 for an '88. I just put down a deposit on a '97 firetruck. I'm expecting to get it by Christmas.


Ally said...

Eek, that's just creepy. Maybe you can sell ice cream out of it, even yuckier. Hee hee!

Cheeseboy said...

I completely support this choice. Especially at that price.

If Jay Leno has one, it would be the first killer thing about that guy that he has ever done.

m. said...

My granddad used to own one.
Prettttty nifty.

Bossy Betty said...

I think you should get it and maybe a hearse too!!


Just turn on the sirens and pass all the traffic that pulls to the side of the road.... You'll save soooooo much time!