Friday, April 12, 2013

Kanga



I can't believe I am actually participating in this challenge. I hope I can make it all the way through. I'm going to need lots of Red Bull. My theme for this challenge is fictional characters including but not limited to cartoons, tv shows, video games, movies, books, etc. Now let's have some fun.

I, PTM, have commandeered the show Inside the Actor's Studio hosted by James Lipton for the A to Z challenge. James is safely being held prisoner until May. He will get plenty of food and water, no need to call the cops. For the month of April, I am renaming his show to Inside the Fictional Character's Studio.




PTM: I have brought in Kanga from the Hundred Acre Wood. She is a huge gossip and knows all the dirty little secrets about all of her friends including Winnie the Pooh. Okay Kanga I am just going to mention someone and you tell us what juicy info that you know about them.
Kanga: I have so much stuff to tell you!!
PTM: Eeyore.
Kanga: Let's just say that his tail isn't the only things he likes to nail into his behind.

PTM: Rabbit.
Kanga: Massive speed freak. Why else do you think he is so tidy?

PTM: Owl.
Kanga: Has been to jail several times on 'Peeping Tom" charges. One more strike and it is off to the big house.

PTM: Piglet.
Kanga: Has been in 10 hardcore pornos as a dominatrix. I haven't seen any yet.

PTM: Tigger.
Kanga: Was in and out of Foster Homes as a child. Spent some time in Juvenile Halls too.

PTM: Roo.
Kanga: I know he is my son but I have to dish. He has a collage of Eeyore pictures and several albums of just Eeyore. It is kind of creepy.

PTM: Christopher Robin.
Kanga: Gets off on torturing squirrels and chipmunks.

PTM: Winnie the Pooh.
Kanga: This one is probably the most shocking. Winnie the Pooh is actually allergic to honey. What you see him eat is some weird substitute that looks like honey.

PTM: Now that you revealed everyone's secrets, it is time to tell everyone what you have been hiding.
Kanga: I don't have any secrets. You don't have anything on me.

PTM: According to a trusted source who shall remain anonymous, Kanga used to be Kango. He had a sex change operation about 22 years ago. He is actually Roo's father. Roo's real mother died during childbirth. What do you have to say about that?
Kanga: It's true, it's all true. Just don't tell Roo. He isn't ready to know yet.
PTM: You heard it hear first folks, Kanga is actually a dude.







8 comments:

Mark said...

Welllll there goes my childhood. Although actually I could believe most of this except perhaps Kanga being born a dude. It would explain what happened to Roo's dad but then it leaves us with the question of where is his mum?

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

Well, now I am scarred for life.

Maple Syrup Land said...

I KNEW there was something odd about Piglet!! Thank you for confirming my suspicions :D

Sheena-kay Graham said...

Poor Eeyore better not read this. What a gossip she is.

Birgit said...

Boy reminds me of my Aunt! I heard Rabbit is on Crystal Meth now. Roo better out for Piglet

Adam said...

never look at her the same

Al Penwasser said...

Kanga, kango, it doesn't matter.
Because it's MUCH better than what Winnie's called.
He may as well be called Winnie the Turd.
Besides, what kind of name is 'Winnie' for a dude?
Well, I assume he's a dude, even though he has no discernible penis.
Well, he doesn't wear pants; it's pretty difficult NOT to notice.

klahanie said...

Having just skimmed through, I mean having thoroughly read your posting, I think I shall never recover.

Kanga, embodies the ethos of this here um blog hop!

Happy alphabeting, human?

Pawsitive wishes, Penny the Jack Russell dog and modest internet superstar!