With us today is a very well known and respected female figure. Please give a warm welcome to the one and only Miss Piggy.
PTM: Thank you for sitting down with us today. It is nice to finally meet you.
Miss Piggy: I know!
PTM: Are you excited about the new Muppets movie coming out?
Miss Piggy: You mean the one I'LL be starring in? Of course! I'm drunk. You're exciting....
PTM: I heard a rumor that you and Kermit were having some marital problems. Something about an affair with Fozzie. Is any of that true?
Miss Piggy: Next question.
PTM: Have you ever eaten bacon?
Miss Piggy: I have. Problem?
PTM: Who is your celebrity crush and what would you do if you met them?
Miss Piggy: Taylor Lautner. everything I would do to him is probably illegal and not just because I'm an animal (winks)
PTM: You have had a very successful career, what do you think you will be doing 10 years from now?
Miss Piggy: Justin Bieber.
PTM: Ok, my director is telling me that a stage hand found a pile of feces in your dressing room. I knew you were a pig, but come on. You couldn’t use the toilet?
Miss Piggy: That's not mine.....OKAY! OKAY! I'm DRUNK. Shit happens!
PTM: Is it true that a few years ago Gonzo was in rehab for 2 months for a coke problem?
Miss Piggy: Yes. But seeing as this questionnaire is about your truly (bats eyes) we could talk about MY coke pro...I mean......(smiles)
PTM: We only have a few more minutes so I’m going to take a question or two from the audience. You, in the front in the Goonies shirt. What is your question?
Audience Member: Can any of the Muppet Babies understand Beaker?
Miss Piggy: When we're under the influence.
PTM: Last question, you, the guy that looks like Santa Claus.
Audience Member: Donald Duck doesn’t wear pants but when he comes out of the shower he wraps a towel around his waist. What’s up with that?
Miss Piggy: That might be due to the time he got arrested for coke. Despite Gonzo's warnings, Donald dropped the soap multiple times. I personally think he enjoyed it.....
PTM: Thank you Miss Piggy for stopping by.
I want to thank my friend Johana for playing the part of Miss Piggy.