So the story left off with Alan being throw overboard. Let's see what happens next.
Alan: Wow that looks like real water and those look like real sharks
Jack: You do realize we are out in the middle of the ocean?
Alan: You mean we aren't in some sort of pirate play?
Jack: Are you really this dumb?
Alan: Ok, I surrender, just don't throw me overboard. I'm not a good swimmer and I don't have my floaties.
Jack: Put him down and untie him.
Alan: Do you have any lotion? Your crew gave me some rope burns.
Jack: What kind of man are you?
Alan: I'm very sensitive. My dad says that I was breast fed for too long.
Jack: I still don't understand how you got aboard The Black Pearl.
Alan: Did Phil and Stu put you up to this? Classic Phil.
Jack: I don't know who this Phil and Stu you keep talking about are.
Alan: So you're going to play it that way are you? They are probably on here somewhere. I'll find them.
Jack: You will do no such thing. You will tell me what the hell is going on or I will re-consider throwing you overboard!!
Alan: So you don't know where Phil is?
Jack: If you mention the name Phil one more time I will cut off your balls with my sword.
Alan: You have a sword? Cool, can I play with it?
Jack: Did you hear what I said? I am going to castrate you.
Alan: Hey man, where is your parrot? Aren't pirates suppose to have parrots?
Jack: Shut up!! Shut up!! Shut up!! You have to be the most annoying idiot that I have ever met. I can't take another second of you. Jack jumps overboard
Alan turns around to face the rest of the crew
Alan: Have any of you seen Phil?
The rest of the crew jump overboard
Alan: (To himself) I must be out of range. I'm not getting a signal on my pager.