Saturday, March 6, 2010

Weird Laws: Part Deux

Here is the next installment of weird laws of the U.S.

CALIFORNIA

In Los Angeles, a man may legally beat his wife with a leather strap, as long as it is less than two inches wide, or she gives him permission to use a wider strap. This is like the third law about beating wives!!

It is a misdemeanor to shoot at any kind of game from a moving vehicle, unless the target is a whale. Next time I'm in California I'm hunting some Moby Dick.

In Pacific Grove, "molesting" butterflies can result in a $500 fine. How does one molest a butterfly? Is there a fine for raping butterflies?

In Pasadena, it is illegal for a secretary to be alone in a room with her boss. Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

It is illegal to set a mousetrap without a hunting license. Are the mousetraps locked up in a glass case with the rifles and shotguns at the store?

In Long Beach, it is illegal to curse on a mini-golf course. We all know how hard that windmill is to putt through.

In San Francisco, it is illegal to wipe one's car with used underwear. As long as I can use my dirty socks.

It is illegal to cry on the witness stand in Los Angeles courts.
They don't care if your family was raped and murdered, there is no reason to get emotional.

COLORADO

In Durango, it is illegal to go out in public dressed in clothing "unbecoming" of one's sex. No crossdressing for me there.

In Logan County, it is illegal for a man to kiss a woman while she is asleep. Sleeping Beauty is so screwed if she lives there.

In Pueblo, it is illegal to let a dandelion grow within city limits. What about 'my mom had a baby and it's head popped off'?

CONNECTICUT

In Hartford, it is illegal to educate a dog. How are the dogs going to run for office with no education?

It is illegal to dispose used razor blades. Good thing I collect rezor blades. I'm making a razor sculptor.

In New Britain, the speed limit for fire trucks is 25 mph, even when going to a fire. Do you like your house medium or well done?

In Hartford, it is illegal for a man to kiss his wife on Sunday. There will be no hanky panky at church.

5 comments:

TS Hendrik said...

Tell California, if I'm on the witness stand, it's my party, and I'll cry if I want to.

California Keys said...

I once cursed on a mini golf course in Long Beach, I'm glad nobody was within listening distance....

I had an employee who was doing an inspection near Monterey (Pacific Grove).... While driving, he saw a big black cloud like object on the freeway. He drove through it, and his windshield was covered in black and orange butterflies....

Jerry said...

I just love these wacky laws. I live in California and never knew about those laws. It makes me laugh maniacally out loud!

Copyboy said...

These are great. Thankfully I'm not in CA, or else I'd have to shell out the $500.

Jim Turley said...

Regarding the Pacific Grove law against butterflies, bear in mind that the law is over 100 years old, and "molesting" simply meant "disturbing or annoying" a butterfly.

The reason is, Monarch butterflies spend the winter in Pacific Grove, so disturbing their hibernation is bad for the butterfly population.