Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Battle of the Cereal Mascots: FINAL ROUND

Wow, that last round was intense. Tony and Trix were neck and neck but then Tony realized he was a tiger and just ate the rabbit. I apologize to all you vegetarians for the graphic image I just put in your head.

This is the last battle to determine who is the greatest cereal mascot of all time. I assumed from the get-go that Tony would be in this last round but Toucan Sam is kind of a surprise. Personally I was rooting for the Cap'n to make it all the way. I have a thing for pirates, I'm thinking about getting a wooden leg.

Treat this final vote like it was for American Idol. I don't watch that show but I hear people enjoy it way too much. I decided to talk to a 3rd grade class and see if they had any questions for our mascots. I brought in the kids with the best questions to interview our combatants. Stick around after the match, we will be giving out free boxes of the winner's cereal.


PTM: Okay Toucan, all these questions are from 8 & 9 year olds. Are you ready?
Toucan Sam: Fire away.
Jake: Where do babies come from?
Toucan Sam: Do you know what a vagina is?
Jake: The state next to West Vagina.
Toucan Sam: Yes, babies come from there.
Sally: Why doesn't my daddy live with us anymore?
Toucan Sam: He probably doesn't love you anymore.
Ricky: How do you wipe your hiney?
Toucan Sam: I use SpongeBob.
Melissa: Where is Mrs. Toucan?
Toucan Sam: She left me for the Sonny the Cocoa Puffs bird. That guy is a real douche.

PTM: Okay Tony it's your turn.
Tony: Hurry up, I have to take a dump.
Jasmine: Who is your favorite superhero?
Tony: Captain Planet, I hate pollution too.
Nick: How do I get a girl to like me?
Tony: Have lots of money and stop picking your nose.
Penny: My mom says I'm not allowed to eat your cereal, too sugary. Can you talk to her?
Tony: Is that her in the leopard spandex? Tell her to meet me at the Super 8 motel at 7 tonight.
Mark: Why don't you wear any pants?
Tony: They don't make any with a tail hole and nobody seems to mind me walking around nude.

Now that we heard from the kids, let's hear from you. Will it be Tony or Toucan? Polls close on Sunday at 11:58 pm. I will announce the winner on Monday or Tuesday next week. Vote now.


The Invisible Seductress said...

No contest....Toucan!!!

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...


Copyboy said...

Undecided. No wait. Tony. Yes Tony!!!

Summer Ross said...

Toucan all the way!

Pat Tillett said...

First off, the questions and answers were hilarious...
West Vagina! I had to laugh out loud at that one.


Rawknrobyn.blogspot.com said...

Anyone who uses Sponge Bob like that gets my vote. Plus, my Cameraman gets his inspiration from Toucan's long beak. This, in turn, keeps me happy - if you know what I mean. That should be worth double points for Toucan.

baygirl32 said...

I still don't like Tony.... Sam gets my vote

Nippy The Penguin said...

Gotta go with Tony the Tiger on this one.

TS Hendrik said...

Toucan. I've followed my nose into some great adventures because of his advice.

Cheeseboy said...

On behalf of the great Mr. Danza, I always pick the TONY!

m. said...


yes yes.

Hart Johnson said...

You almost had me at NUDE, but then I realized Toucan Sam is ALSO nude, but the fancy tail feathers make him almost like a cross-dressed nude, which is even BETTER.


Sadako said...

Tony! I've been a Tony gal since the beginning! And he makes not wearing pants look sexier than Gaga ever does!

Ian said...


The Man-Cave said...

Since Tony took out my fave, I will root for him to eat the Toucan as well. TONY!!!!

Unknown said...

Tony! REOWR!

Baby Sister said...

Hahaha. Hilarious. Yes, it's too late to vote, but I say Toucan!!