While Bert and Ernie were getting ready for the battle I got a hold of their personal diaries. I am going to randomly share some entries with you for your entertainment. Shhh, don't tell them I shared their diaries.
2/24/11 - I had a dream about Bert again. We were living in the country with 3 kids, 2 dogs and running our own pudding business. He looked so handsome. The kiss felt so real this time.
3/16/11 - It was so sad. I had a dream that Rubber Duckie drowned in the tub. We were at his funeral. All the Sesame Street characters were there except for Big Bird, they didn't get along for some reason. Alf, Optimus Prime and Rainbow Brite also came to pay their respects.
4/12/11 - I enjoy watching Bert sleep. I hope he doesn't find out that I have been cupping his balls at night.
4/25/11 - Bert caught me today using his toothbrush. I use it sometimes just so I can taste his saliva. I played if off today like I picked up the wrong one.
6/02/11 - I should kill Big Bird. No one likes that douche anyway. Why doesn't he like Rubber Duckie? What an asshole.
3/15/11 - Ernie is starting to act really creepy lately. He keeps leering at me with a weird look on his face. I'm thinking about moving out.
4/20/11 - I'm missing like three pairs of my underwear. I think Ernie might be taking them but I can't prove it.
5/17/11 - I had a really strange dream that Ernie was watching me in my sleep and cupping my balls. At least I think it was a dream.
6/09/11 - If I hear that rubber duckie song again I am going to stick a broom handle up Ernie's ass.
6/19/11 - I will never masturbate with baby oil again. I'm really raw down there now. I need to buy some lotion.
After laughing and peeing your pants, don't forget to vote for either Bert or Ernie. Polls will close on Friday at 11:59 pm and the next set of rounds will begin next week.