Tuesday, March 12, 2013

Battle of the Fast Food Mascots: Semi-Finals Round 2


Holy cow!! That creepy clown didn't stand a chance against that Cow. The Cow wins by a landslide. I haven't seen something that lopsided since Tara Reid's boob job. Next week is the FINAL ROUND. Make sure you don't miss it. It will be a once in a lifetime event.

Will it be The King or Little Caesar's "Pizza, Pizza" Guy? (I'm secretly voting for The King because his name is a lot easier to type). Today I decided to let people in the audience and from home submit questions for today's combatants.



VS




PTM: First set of questions are for The King. This one is from 10 year old Timothy Dwyer. I like Mcdonald's fries better. Can you tell my dad to stop taking me to Burger King?
The King: That depends Timmy, does your dad like Royal Jam?
PTM: That is all sorts of disturbing. Next question is from 82 year old Emma Fitzsimmons. How come you don't serve Sanka?
The King: Ma'am, this isn't 1971. If you ran out of Sanka, I'm sure you can find some buried coffee cans in your back yard.
Cameraman #2: Grandma, I told you to stop writing into the show with silly questions.
PTM: I love grandma Fitzsimmons. She makes the best blueberry pie and she is easy on the eyes.
Cameraman ##2: You are not hooking up with my gamma again. We already went through this once.
PTM:  She is a grown woman and she can make her own choices. Let's move on. The last question for The King come from William Clinton. I love chubby ankles. Thanks for helping little Bill get off.
The King: Was that really from the president? No problem Bill. You are my hero.
PTM: He is one horny and crazy dude. Let's move onto questions for Little Caesar's "Pizza, Pizza" Guy aka Carl..

PTM: First question is from 56 year old Frank Spinosa. I get diarrhea every time I eat your pizza, should I consult a doctor about this?
Carl: Maybe a brain doctor. How about you stop eating food that gives you diarrhea all the time. What a moron.
PTM: Carl, giving it to 'em straight. Next question is from 42 year old Sasha Kingston. Little Caesar's sucks, Domino's is better. 
Carl: I think I know that name, I think she works at a Little Caesar's. I would have to agree with you Sasha but Domino's keeps telling me they don't need a mascot.
PTM: Final question is from 7 year old Patty Arnold. Why does my friend Julie have two mommies? I want two mommies.
Carl: Patty are you familiar with the term 'Rug Muncher'? If not I would ask your mommy.
PTM: Well that is all the questions we have today. 

Make sure you cast your vote on the poll on the top left of the blog. The winner here will face The Cow next week for the ultimate crown. (If The King wins he does get a different crown to wear).








16 comments:

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

Bill and chubby ankles will disturb me all day now...

Mark said...

The clown lost? Damn, I guess we're not going to see the fated battle between the King and the Clown yet. The King continues to get my vote though because of the toys he's producing.

Rawknrobyn.blogspot.com said...

I'm all about the King. Do you think he and William will share whoppers with me?

xoRobyn

Addman said...

I vote for The King because I'm not familiar with the other guy.

Al Penwasser said...

Doesn't Domino work on a stripper pole?
I can't vote for that creepy King. He reminds me of Mr. Mraz from down the street. Who, apparently, wasn't too fond of trousers.

Baby Sister said...

As tired as you are of writing out Pizza man's name, I'll be voting for him. His food is ten times better.

Chuck said...

You hang out with some questionable people...I am a little creeped out by most of them. I am LC all the way!!

Shockgrubz said...

I'm glad my pick won this round, and it seems he's extended the next round to get a few more votes. I'm in for the next round!

Birgit said...

ordered the pizza once-blecchhh. At least I can vote for the King-Does he tweet using a real bird too? Maybe he has a hunk a hunk aburning love for chubby ankles.

A Beer For The Shower said...

Who doesn't love a good pair of cankles? Slick Willy just tells it like it is.

PeaceLoveandSharpies said...

My vote goes to the King only because Little Caesar's Pizza tastes like old shoes

Pat Hatt said...

Te pizza guy gets my vote for telling the diarrehea moron off haha

W.C.Camp said...

The creepy King would beat that Little Caesar dude anyday ... or stalk him? W.C.C.

Bossy Betty said...

I wanna wake up with the King.

(That lady is also in my house! AHHHHHH!)

Tree said...

I love the pizza pizza guy!!

Pat Tillett said...

I was hoping the King would be gone by now... He's scary...