He Told Me To Do It

I downloaded a Chuck Norris Facts app on my phone. I should do a review of my new phone, it's the Droid 2. I will work on that another day. This post is about Chuck Norris. He might get angry that I started a post about him and didn't finish. I wanted to share some of the crazy facts on this app. I found them funny. Tell me what you think of them.

Disclaimer: Some of you might have heard them already and some of you don't give a crap about Chuck Norris. To this I say, I don't care, read them anyway.

Chuck Norris counted to infinite twice.

Chuck Norris wipes his add with duct tape.

If you look under China it says 'Made by Chuck Norris'.

Chuck Norris can make a slinky go upstairs.

Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.

When Chuck Norris plays Monopoly it affects the economy.

Chuck Norris' beard can grow a mustache.

Chuck Norris beat angry birds on a rotary telephone.

Chuck Norris was born in a log cabin that he built with his own two hands.

Chuck Norris rhymes with orange.

Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

Chuck Norris doesn't tea bag the ladies, he potato sacks them.

Michael Jordan wears Air Chucks.

Chuck Norris gargles with peanut butter.

Chuck Norris planted the idea for the movie Inception.

Chuck Norris once smoked a cigarette. The cigarette got cancer.

Chuck Norris killed two stones with one bird.

Chuck Norris can unscramble an egg.

Chuck Norris receives mail on Sundays.

Chuck Norris had sex in a semi truck. Some of his semen got infused with the seat. The truck is know known as Optimus Prime.

Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did.

Chuck Norris is the only man that can give a girl a boner.

Chuck Norris can rape you during phone sex.

As a side note, I will be starting up Trivia Corner again next week. So get those thinking caps on real tight.