Tuesday, January 31, 2017
Every now and again a thought will enter my head and I think to myself, maybe I should share that? I would say I forget 80% of what I want to write. Most of these thoughts happen while I am driving or in the shower. Neither of which is a good time to be typing on a phone, tablet or computer.
What is up with the Star Registry program? Apparently you can name a star after someone and it only costs $59. Sorry this scam is only if you live in the United States but they might have a similar program where you live. I don't recall the U.S. owning the sky or the stars so I don't know how they are able to do this. The guy in the radio commercial sounds like Penn Jillette. What a lame present to give someone. How the fuck do you know where the star is?
"Hey, I was lazy so I named a star after you."
"Umm, that one." (points randomly at the sky)
"How much did it cost?"
"Next time just give me the money, douche."
Let's change the subject. Say you are moving into your first apartment and you bought all brand new stuff, new furniture, new utensils, new linens, new toiletries, etc. Say you bought a new pair of scissors and new set of steak knives. How do you open the packages without having a pair of scissors or knife to open it? You will never be able to tear open that thick plastic. Seems like a catch-22. You might have to knock on your neighbors door to borrow their scissors unless their scissors are still in the packaging from when they moved in. This situation could spiral out of control.
Two topics to discuss with your friends.
Posted by Powdered Toast Man at 11:27 PM